Helping Your Child Deal with Bullying at School

By True Schools Staff

It would be important to point out that bullying can actually result in lifelong consequences, so make sure you lend a good ear if your child has concerns with it. Then, help him come up with a plan to avoid bullying, or even stop it completely.

Once upon a time, bullying was just a regular phase of childhood. However, things are different now. Bullying has become a real problem and the worst part is that most children go through it. In fact, bullying even extends to cyberspace nowadays, with various forms of virtual harassment popping up left and right.

Kinds of Bullying

Every child could be a victim of bullies, but younger children and those who are easy to intimidate and do not have any friends are usually the targets. Bullying has several different forms, as follows:

• Physical bullying refers to various kinds of physical harm, like hitting, kicking and punching, and property destruction.
• Verbal bullying refers to racial slurs, teasing, taunting and name-calling. Sometimes, malicious rumors or gossip are spread, too.
• Cyberbullying refers to harassing emails, text messages and instant messages, and threatening or intimidating websites, posts or blogs.

The Consequences

Victims of bullies might get scared of school, in general. They might pretend to have stomachaches or headaches, or might have trouble focusing on their schoolwork. The consequences may get worse as time goes by, and the victims may end up with higher rates of anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, as well as various other mental health issues. They are also more likely to try and commit suicide later on in life.

The Warning Signs

Children who are being bullied usually stay quite because they are scared, embarrassed or ashamed of their situation. Here are several warning signs you should look out for:

• Lack of close friends
• Physical complaints, like headaches or stomachaches
• Missing or damaged clothes and personal belongings
• Bad school performance
• Reluctance to ride the bus or go to school
• Difficulty eating or sleeping
• Unexplained injuries and bruises

What Should You Do?

If your child seems to be a victim of bullies, do the following:

• Get in touch with school officials. Speak to the school principal or counselor, or approach one of the teachers. If a physical attack or a threat has been made, get in touch with these officials right away in order to find out if you need to call the police. Do not get in touch with the parents of the bullies yourself. It might also be smart to ask the school to give a talk about bullying and cyberbullying in their curriculum.
• Follow up. Get in touch with these school officials every now and then to see how the bullying situation in the school is going. Be persistent.
• Boost your child's confidence. Help him participate in activities to raise his confidence, like a sport, or art or music. Encourage him to make friends and to become more social, in general.
• Ask your child what is wrong. Stay calm, listen intently and support how your child feels. Tell him how concerned you are and that you understand. Then, remind him that it isn't his fault and try to work together to find a solution to the problem.
• Know when to get professional advice. Consider school or professional counseling if your child can't get over his anxiety or fear.
• Find out more about bullying. Ask your child for more details about what he is going through, and talk to adults or children who have witnessed bullying incidents, as well. Every little bit helps.
• Tell your child what to do next time. Now, this doesn't mean that he should fight back and get his revenge. Instead, tell him to stay calm and just walk away. Tell him to stick to a group of children whenever possible, and remind him that he can ask the school officials and teachers for help whenever he needs it.

If your child happens to be a victim of bullying, keep in mind that the best solution would be an early intervention. This will help prevent problems that might crop up in the future, like depression, low self-confidence and anxiety. Also, do not let your child deal with it alone. Support him at all costs.